The Before and After
by qualls1
Summary: Gromov looked over to me then and asked a question I'd been trying to avoid since day one: "Did you lose anyone in the fall-out?" And I couldn't even look at him when I said, "I've been trying not to think of that too much." SnippyxOC


**Romantically Apocalyptic belongs to Alexiuss. **

_I tried to forget about it the best I could; I don't think about it when I have the time. I wanted to erase every memory of her from my mind. I wanted her to become nothing but a figment of my slowly descending sanity. _

_So, the only logical way to do that (in my opinion) would be to remember all of it to the greatest detail, then never ever feel like I needed to think of it ever again. _

_So I will. Right here. Now._

_But it's not as if she was a horrible part of my life that I despise. No, that would be where Gromov, Captain, and Pilot stand. _

_She was everything. _

_And now there's nothing. _

Such joy.

I've been transferred. AT LAST.

Ha, that blasted office desk will have to find a new knee to slam into now. That fat guy across from me will find some other stranger to randomly start talking to. I was being _transferred!_

I was shipped my uniform- the gas mask, the goggles- all in one box. I found that having the goggles was a plus: no one would have to see the bags under my eyes. Also, another great thing was that I got two hours extra to sleep.

YES…

"Mr. Charles Snippy?" One of the other tour guides, a man in a uniform similar to mine but way less clean, said. "You'll be running that there terrain vehicle." He pointed.

I tried my very best to stand at least five feet away from him.

"Okay, thanks." I muttered quickly, taking the clip board he was holding out for me.

"Er," he slurred, "Ya might wanna put that mask on now. Don't want your lungs to melt, now do we?"

I had my goggles on, but the mask was in my other hand. Stiffening, I quickly put it on, only to have him laugh at me. "Just kiddin with ya! Ha, some of the non ANNET users… so stupid…" he says this while struggling to unlatch his ANNET bands. I was glaring, and he apparently could tell. Must have been the goggle flaps or something.

Moving on…

I approached the small group of ANNET-using tourists with a forced smile. I stammered over a couple of my words, but other than that, I did what I was supposed to. One of them, an older man than I, but still rather built, shoved me to the side just a little to let his wife scuttle past me and onto the terrain vehicle first. I boiled a little on the inside, but held back my tongue.

There was no way I could get fired from this job.

The terrain driver gave me a gesture with his gloved hand to sit down fast, so I turned to my seat.

But there was someone already there.

"Hello…" she said, almost quietly. She wore a mask and goggles, so I had no idea what she looked like, or how old she was, or if she was even a tourist like all the others. She hadn't been in the group back there and she wasn't wearing the standard masks and goggles-

The driver… apparently… did not care if I was still standing, for he slammed on the gas and I went lurching forward, catching myself on the side of the seat. Thankfully, no one laughed. They were too busy surfing the net while they still could.

Her hand reached out and touched my shoulder, "You alright…?" there was a shakiness to her laugh. I grumbled something, sitting down next to her.

"They didn't tell me there was going to be a medic riding with us." I said shortly, not really looking at her. She made a small 'meh' sound. I had noticed her scarf with the red cross on it, and also she was holding the key to the first aid kit up by the driver.

"It IS the Dead Zone. There might be an emergency."

Her hand was soon in front of me. "I'm Sarah."

"Charles Snippy. I'd rather it be formal…"

She just stared. I didn't take her hand.

The rest of the ride there was kinda quiet.

She stood by my side, or at least _off to the side_, all day, first-aid-kit in hand. She only spoke up when one of the tourists were too close to something harmful, and at that cue, I would promptly yell at them to get back with the group.

At the end of the day, I found her in front of me, blocking the way to the subway trains. "Excuse me?" I muttered, a small scowl forming. I didn't want to be rude or anything, but I was tired and she was standing in the way of me and my sleep.

"I don't know if we got off to a bad start or something… but I'm going to be your co-worker from now on and I don't want things to be awkward or tense between us." With her mask and goggles still in place, I couldn't tell if nervousness was making her talk so fast.

"Look, everything is fine. Now if you don't mind, I want to go home. It's been a long day." I said this through gritted teeth. People were bustling buy, filling the subway in an alarming rate. If I didn't hurry and get on, I'd be pressed against a sliding door, waiting to be thrown out at my stop.

Sarah took a moment to fumble with her goggles, taking them and her mask off. It was then, that I first caught a glimpse of her.

She had fairly pale skin, but in the **G**OOD dome, everyone was pale unless they got a spray tan. The lights of the subway made her complexion look like it was under a blacklight, but even so, she was quite pretty. With green, bright eyes and no makeup, it was easy to tell her emotions.

For instance: flustered.

"I'm not meaning to hold you up. I just wanted to-,"

"Yea, cool story bro." I scowled, lightly brushing her aside. "Look, I'll see you in the morning. Don't…" I paused, glancing back at her before I boarded the train. "Don't worry about it."

And with that, the doors slid shut.

She was still standing there, looking right at me, when about twenty people shoved me against the glass doors. "OOF-!," I grunted as my face was smooshed against the door's glass window. I had time to see her hand go up in a struggle to hold in a laugh before the train zipped away and sent me home.

There were people on the train who would shift around every now and again, trying to find a patch of higher signal or trying to gain more Wi-Fi. I managed to turn my body where I wasn't face-first into the door, and took a deep breath. It was hard to, considering there was a busty woman in front of me who seemed oblivious that her elbow kept jabbing me as she stroked her own hair.

A little kid who was screaming his head of raised his foot and brought it down harshly on mine. I let a certain forbidden word slip and his father glared at me the rest of the way home.

At last, I was at the station a block away from home. I'd get off there and cross main street and _finally_ be home. It wasn't like I disliked my job (actually, yea I hated it)… it just wasn't… great.

So far, at least.

Crossing main street always gave me chills. There were billions of people, everywhere and in every corner of every alley. Yet no one made a sound. Everyone talked via ANNET, meaning they never opened their mouths. Children, like the kid on the train, also used ANNET to speak, but could make sounds when they wanted to.

So the whole place was quiet except for the footfalls and the sound of the shuttle as it moved overhead.

It was horrifyingly realistic.

As I closed the door to my apartment, I felt a wave of sleep deprivation was over me. Bed…now… find… bed… got… to… sleep…

I had time to strip myself of my main clothes: My jacket, my pants, my shirt. At last I slithered under the covers and promptly prepared myself for a night of sleep.

It wasn't two minutes later that I opened my eyes again. There would be no 'good night of rest'. There would be the nightmares… and even my online therapist wouldn't ever know exactly how real they feel.

**oOo**

The next morning was awkward like the first. I didn't fall this time when the driver took off, but Sarah didn't talk at all. I didn't get so much as a 'Good morning, co-worker!' or 'How have you been, fellow employee?'.

In fact, she didn't so much as look at me.

"Did I piss you off yesterday?" I asked when we bored the terrain car for a third time that day. Her head snapped up and the sun reflected off her red goggles. Bio Hazzard symbols were the only things keeping me from going blind.

"Piss me off?" She asked incredulously. "I don't think so… why, do I seem mad?"

Taken off guard by such a direct question, I stumbled through my words, "Ah-no-I mean- I don't know- It's just that- you look like you didn't want to talk to me."

She must have let off a small smile through her gasmask, because I heard a small chuckle. "No, I'm just tired is all. I've been re-assigned this job… but… I shouldn't be here right now."

I just stared.

She went on, "Not to bring any offense to you, but, this job is a pretty low-on-the-totem-pole to me. Just last week I was making seventy thousand credits an hour. How I got here… it's a long, harsh story, really."

This came as a shock to me. I had never met anyone who made that much money. Except, maybe, for Gromov, who occasionally showed up for a conference.

"Seventy thousand credits…" I repeated numbly, "Then… why are you here of all places-?"

There was a dull, emotionless bite to her tone, "Because I don't use ANNET and apparently that makes me less capable of saving lives."

I went rigid. "You don't use ANNET-?"

"Not sense I was fifteen." She said, almost proudly, like she had broken a smoking habit.

I had never met another non ANNET user. Not in my whole life. To have one sitting in the same seat as me was… a little too much.

I went quiet and studied her carefully. Now that I remember, I hadn't seen ANNET bands on her the night before. But for all I could have known, she could have been able to access ANNET without headbands.

But no.

"Oh," Was all I could think to say.

After a moment Sarah poked my side, which startled me. "What?" I asked softly, still thinking hard.

"You don't use it either, do you? That's why I could talk to you."

Now that she said it, yea, I had been able to have a normal conversation with her yesterday.

God, I'm such an idiot.

We talked for the rest of the ride, just about random things. I had to ask eventually though, "Do you ever have nightmares?"

She looked at me for a moment and blinked. "Um, not any more irregularly than most people. I mean, every month or so. Why?"

My heart fell. "Ah, was just wondering."

She looked concerned for a minute.

By the end of the day, I had forgotten all about asking her how she had been downgraded so greatly. I had forgotten to ask what kind of a job she had had to be able to make so much money in such a small amount of time. I had forgotten to ask why she was here, and not back making seventy thousand credits.

**oOo**

A week had passed, and not much more had happened. Sarah and I talked a little; I tried not to pound her with questions. But the nightmares were coming more frequently. Because I had extra sleep hours, I was getting more and more dream time.

"You alright?" She asked that question a lot.

"Fine." I muttered, resting my head on the seat in front of me. "Just tired."

"How many hours of sleep did you get?"

_About two._

"I don't know… four or five?" I took my goggles off and rubbed my eyes. "I should be fine."

Something brushed against my cheek and when I went to look at it, it was pulling my face the other way. I stared at her for a minute, unwillingly due to her hand on my cheek. "No, you're not… Want me to buy you a coffee? My treat, of course." And she smiled.

_This was just the beginning._

**oOo**

**MAN THAT TOOK A LONG TIME TO EDIT...  
**

**Sorry bout not posting for a while guys. I've been into a lot more stuff other than RA. I mean, it's still pretty close to my heart and what not, but I've been into other stuff lately. Okay, okay, no more excuses. Hope you enjoyed this :)  
**


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